move out, don't mess around...

In the last month or so (pretend I'm writing this blog Monday), two of my friends have moved away from New York. Both had very good reasons for doing so and one, at least (I hope both) seems to be happy with his decision thus far. I myself cannot imagine packing up my life and moving anywhere farther from where I am now than New Jersey. Even that would be a stretch. I honestly believe that I both a) talk too fast and b) am too impatient to live anywhere but New York. I understand there are other big cities out there where people are often rude and lose their tempers with those who don't belong. In fact, I'm sure there are others right here on the east coast (see: Boston), but New York is too much "my home" for me to ever consider leaving it. Not that I think my friends are crazy for moving on; far from it. I think it takes a certain strength of character to start over, a strength that I do not have. I rely on my friends and family so much. I can't decide if that's a good or bad thing... maybe it's just a neutral thing and there's nothing good or bad about it. It's just different.

I will however be moving in the next few months, although to where is still a mystery. I may possibly be looking at an aprtment tomorrow. My brother's friend offered us a spot in his duplex for $425 a piece... but we'd have to share a bedroom. For two full seconds, I actually debated the possibility, because $425 a month in rent was such a nice number to roll around my brain, but in the end I realized I am a twenty-seven year old woman, my brother is a twenty-four year old man and- even if we were seven and four again- I am a spoiled brat who has never shared a room with anyone and desparately enjoys her privacy once in a while. So yeah. Sorry, $425. Maybe next time.

i believe i can fly

There was a bird in my apartment yesterday. The idea that I might have been in the same closed-in area with a bird while at my most vulnerable (i.e. straight out of the shower... I don't know why I feel that way, but I do. I guess it's the thought of running out of my house naked in blind fear. The bird would only be the beginning of my problems.) is both thrilling and terrifying. Let me explain: apparently, Sunday night, my cousin, while letting her dog out to do its business in our backyard through the basement back door, accidentally allowed a black bird to fly into the house. I will blame this entire thing on that dog, although it is very nice, because it is extremely badly behaved and almost tore my finger off in its choke chain once when I was trying to walk it... but that's another story. Anyway, she did what any typical woman would do (me included) and ran back to her apartment, slamming the door shut behind her. Monday afternoon, she went back to the basement and couldn't find the bird. She had happened to call her father (our landlord) to come fix a heating issue in the house. In doing so, they both went upstairs to my apartment to check the thermostat. All three occupants were at work, but my cousin heard a rustling noise in the living room and slowly went to investigate, at which point, she found the bird trapped in the curtains behind my couch. My uncle somehow grabbed it in a towel and set it free off my back porch. I'm sure my neighbor will have some reason to complain about this incident, too. The bird was probably making so much noise, he couldn't hear his television.

When I got home yesterday evening, all that remained of the bird were some wrinkled curtains and a few droplets on my couch that resembled white out. But the scariest part of this is that there was no contact with this bird from Sunday night, till Monday afternoon, which means that it could very well have been in my living room, sitting in the dark, while I was getting ready for work. I just can't even imagine how terrified I would have been had I heard a noise, gone to check it out, and been hit in the face with a camouflaged and panicked bird. I'd probably still be crying.

I wonder if I'd be this afraid of birds if a seagull hadn't tried to steal my turkey sandwich out of my hands when I was eleven. I mean, I got the sandwich back, but ultimately the seagull won, as my parents wouldn't let me eat it after the bird's claws had been sunk into the roll. I can still see that bird flapping in my face and my cousin, Michael, then sixteen, sitting on a beach chair nearby, laughing.

Don't tell me I'm not scarred.

i'm a loser, baby...

Seven days in and I think the New Year's resolution is coming along pretty well. I am actively trying to stay positive but I hope that, eventually, I won't have to think about it anymore and it'll just happen. Like breathing.

I'm also part of a Biggest Loser competition with some of my family members. I was asked by my cousin if I wanted to take part in it, and her question was prefaced with, "I don't want to insult you by asking this, but..." I'm glad she thinks I am fit enough to be insulted by being asked if I want to lose weight. Anyway, I have to kick in $20 at the beginning and then, for every week I gain, I have to throw in another $5. I believe we're doing this until some time around Easter. I usually hover around the same weight anyway, so as long as I don't gain, I won't lose all that much money. I've tried before to switch my diet over to healthy foods, which for me, mostly means grilled chicken instead of fried. But this time, I think I'll try a little harder, being that there's money involved. I also did a 22 minute Exercise-on-Demand in my living room last night, ignoring the fact that I actually belong to a gym to which I NEVER GO. I swear, if I ever try to pay money to a gym again, someone direct me to this post. Unless I am doing Fenix Down full-time and have free mornings and afternoons in which to make myself attractive to our millions of fans. Then, it's all right.

I'm also trying to do some other good things for myself in this new year. I cooked myself an actual dinner last night (grilled chicken... see?... and rice) as opposed to eating ramen noodles or a grilled cheese. I've also been wearing my glasses at work, like I'm supposed to. I'm taking care of myself this year. All I have to do is actually fill out that 401K paperwork and I'll really be on the ball. I've only been sitting on that for over a year... I'm sure I'll get to it any day now.